How Princess Diana Bravely Defied The Rules of the Royal Family

In 1981, Diana Spencer married Prince Charles and became a member of a royal family that was strict about adhering to tradition and upholding dated marital values and gender roles. She was quoted as saying "I do things differently because I don't go by a rule book because I lead from the heart, not the head." Though her rebellious ways sometimes came off as scandalous, her impact is still relevant today. Here are some of her most prominent rule-breaking ideas...

She Gave Birth in a Hospital

A royal tradition that has withstood centuries is home birth. The mothers were put to sleep and the babies were birthed using forceps. This allowed for an easy, drama-free birth on the family.  However, that wasn't in Diana's plans. She wanted to be awake and give birth naturally, which meant she'd need to be admitted to a hospital. Since then, both Kate Middleton and Meghan Markle have also delivered their babies in hospitals.

She Publicly Supported Charities

Diana was nicknamed "The People's Princess" for obvious reasons. She loved to be involved with charities firsthand, and she was one of the first royals who made the effort to interact with people face-to-face rather than just with donations. She's most famous for shaking hands with HIV positive patients and walking across minefields to spread awareness to land mines. 

She Gave Out Hugs

In the past, it was forbidden to touch someone in the royal family. Diana broke that boundary because she didn't want to perpetuate the idea that was any sort of divide between herself and the public. Not only did she stop to chat and shake hands, but she'd also hug anyone who wanted to interact with her.

She Chose Her Sons' Names

In the past, the father took on the responsibility of naming his royal children. Furthermore, the names were typically already within the family and held some sort of historical significance. However, Prince Charles did not name William or Harry, Diana did. He wanted to call them Arthur and Albert, two very important royal names, but her preferences made the final cut. 

She Wore Bold Fashion Choices

Diana is remembered as one of the classiest royal women to have ever lived. She looked chic no matter what she wore, whether it was a classic white blouse and slacks, or a stunning evening gown. However, she was never afraid to take risks with bold fits or colors, unlike some of her royal counterparts (i.e., Queen Elizabeth, who wears the same type of skirt-suit every day).

She Never Shied Away From Affection

The royal family has always been very anti-PDA. No kissing, touching or hand-holding in public. Media outlets have recently been picking on Meghan and Harry for this, stating how odd such intimate public contact is. Diana wasn't afraid to break this rule though, especially with her children. Prince Harry has said, "she would just engulf you and squeeze you as tight as possible."

She Brought Her Kids Everywhere

Royal children don't often accompany their parents on their work and leisure trips, especially out if the country if they were very young, but Diana wouldn't leave William and Harry behind. She wanted a genuine relationship with them, and most importantly, she wanted them to just be normal kids. 

Her Boys Lived a Normal Life

William and Harry lived as normal a life as they could. Yes, they attended a ritzy public school, but they still did totally average kid things like eat at McDonald's and ride public transportation. They loved playing outside and riding their bikes. At amusement parks, they waited in line like everyone else. Diana did her best to make sure her boys were grounded.

She Wrote Her Own Wedding Vows

Traditional royal wedding vows always, without fail, include the words "cherish," "love," and "obey." Diana didn't like the idea of having to obey her husband, so she omitted it completely from her vows. 

She Held a Paid Position Before Becoming a Princess

Before she got married, she was actually born into a family of British nobility. Her father was the Earl of Spencer. However, her status didn't stop her from wanting to pursue a career even though she probably didn't need to. She encouraged her sons to carry on this legacy of working hard for themselves and not relying on a status to get them through life.

She Broke the Barriers Between Royals and Staff

In the past, there has been a distinct divide between royals and their staff. But while Diana reigned, she encouraged her sons to wander about the kitchens and talk with the staff. She emboldened them to help with cooking and cleaning too. William and Harry even played with the staff's children, which until then was unheard of. 

She Advocated for Mental Health

Diana never shied away from openly discussing her marital issues with Prince Charles or her struggles with an eating disorder. She was very honest and spoke about her battle with bulimia as "something you inflict upon yourself because your self-esteem is at a low ebb, and you don't think you're worthy or valuable... It's a repetitive pattern which is very self-destructive."

She Went Out In Disguise

Diana was a mischevious royal! According to her friend, actress Cleo Rocos, the princess wanted to go out one night with Rocos, Freddie Mercury, and Kenny Everett. Of course, royal discourse discouraged such a thing, so she went out in an outfit that nobody would recognize her in. 

She Wore Bold Makeup Looks

Diana's signature look was a pop of bright blue eyeliner. She wasn't a fan of the undertoned brown natural look that most royal women wore. She was unique and wanted the world to know that she was fun and relatable and could make her own fashion choices. Makeup is very personal, and her look was always her own.

She Broke Fashion Rules

For her first official royal appearance alongside Prince Charles, she wore a strapless gown, which was absolutely not a part of the dress code. She did this on multiple occasions: she once wore a choker as a tiara and wore dresses and skirts that showed her knees.

She Was Open About Her Marriage Troubles

Diana was one of the rare royals who was open about her personal life. She also talked about Charle's very public affair with Camilla Parker-Bowles. She has been quoted as saying "A woman's instinct is a very good one; obviously I had knowledge of it from people who minded and cared about our marriage ... There were three of us in this marriage, so it was a bit crowded." She wasn’t afraid to speak truthfully, making jabs at her husband.

She Got Down to Kid-Level

Diana had a soft spot for children. She loved to mingle with the public, and the littlest members of society were no exception - in fact, they were sometimes her priority. While royals were supposed to keep some level of distance between the public, Diana let go of that tradition completely and let the people know her.

She Wore Bold Nail Polish

As with eyeliner, Diana liked to paint her nails her way. She often wore bright colors to royal events, something that other royal women typically didn't do. She wanted to look nice, and she wanted to dress the way she was most comfortable.

She Didn't Usually Wear Hats or Gloves

Diana was much less formal than the Queen. She often decided to forgo the gloves, something notable since she was so fond of holding and shaking hands. Diana liked to make physical contact with the people she met. She also didn’t wear hats often, once saying it was hard to cuddle children with a hat on.

She Was a Hands-On Mom

Diana loved to do things her way, and parenting was no exception. She hugged her children, breastfed them as infants, and didn't employ nannies often. She wanted to spend as much time with her sons as possible, and they went almost everywhere with her. Some of the most iconic photos of Diana and her boys show her laughing with or hugging them. 

She Had an Influence Over the Queen

Surprisingly, the rebellious princess had quite an effect on the Queen. Once Diana married into the family, Elizabeth eased up on some of their rules regarding attire, travel, and public interactions. Though her marriage to Charles didn't last, her sons still carry on her more lax legacy. 

Her Kids Had a Life Outside Royalty

While many royals prefer the confines of the palace, Princess Diana wanted to show her children that there was more to life outside those walls. She took them to homeless shelters and to visit hospitals. While they were royal by blood, she wanted them to be aware of the rest of the world.

She Accidentally Broke a Christmas Rule

One royal tradition is that the family typically gives each other gag gifts. However, early on in her marriage, Diana didn't know this and gave Princess Anne a very nice cashmere sweater. Luckily, she learned and followed the rule for the subsequent years.

She Sent Her Kids to Public School

Royal children are usually tutored at home, but Diana felt like that wouldn't benefit them socially or foster a sense of normalcy. Royal children typically didn't mingle with other children who weren't royal, and Diana didn't like that at all. Prince Charles had broken that mold as well by attending a private college years earlier.

She Flew With Her Kids

It might seem like a pretty mundane thing, but royal travel protocol ensured that an entire royal family didn't travel altogether in the off chance that something tragic would happen. If there was no heir to the throne, chaos would ensue. However, Diana literally threw rules out the window and insisted her sons went on flights with her. Today, Prince William flies on the same airplane as his own children.

Her Family Came Before Her Duties

Diana shouldered many responsibilities as the wife to the direct heir to the throne. However, while she did sometimes leave her children with a nanny, if she could forgo some duties and spend time with her family, she would. She did her best to maintain a relatively flexible schedule because young kids are unpredictable.

She Stopped and Chatted With the Public

When out in public, it had been customary for royals to go through the crowd without stopping to interact, preferring to keep a distinction between themselves and the common public. However, this started changing when Queen Elizabeth II started doing walkabouts, or casual strolls, in the 1970s.

She Chose Her Own Engagement Ring

Engagement rings for royal weddings are usually custom made, but Diana decided to pick out her ring from a catalog instead. The 12-carat sapphire surrounded by 14 diamonds was deemed "not unique enough" for a princess. It must be good enough, though, because now Prince William's wife Kate Middleton wears it.

She Had a Public Life After Her Divorce

Diana still remained in the public eye after her divorce. She was well adored by the public and reporters, and her new relationship with Dodi Al Fayed was documented up until the moment she died. She still continues to make headlines today, over two decades after her death. 

She Didn't Often Use Nannies

It's important to note how much of a contrast Diana was to previous royal parents. Most children spent nearly all of their time with nannies, but not William and Harry. Being a mom was Diana's top priority. 

She Wore Black

Princess Diana was known for her bold and fun fashion choices, but not everyone realizes just how rebellious her clothing was. Traditionally, royals wear colorful but understated clothing, with solid black and darker hues reserved for more serious, somber occasions.

Her Parents Divorced When She Was 7

Diana's parents, Frances Shand Kydd and Edward John Spencer, 8th Earl Spencer, divorced when she was just seven years old. Diana's parents had a tumultuous relationship, and she cited cheating and physical abuse as some of the reasons for their separation.

She Had Four Siblings

Diana was the fourth of five children in her family. Her two sisters, Sarah (now Lady Sarah McCorquodale) and Jane (now lady Jane Fellowes)and a younger brother Charles Spencer have survived her. 

She Grew Up On The Sandringham Estate

Sandringham House is located in Norfolk and is owned by the royal family. On the grounds is Park House, where Princess Diana's mother Frances was born in 1936 and Diana was born in 1961. The estate is a royal family staple and Sandringham House hosts many of the family holidays.

She Wanted To Study Ballet

Diana had goals to become a professional ballerina and studied dance for years, but she was too tall to continue it as a career. She went on to work in public service and held various philanthropic jobs before she met Prince Charles. She never coasted on her title or status.

She Became "Lady" Diana Through Her Father's Family

Diana became Lady Diana Spencer in 1975 after her father inherited the title of Earl Spencer. "Lady Di" became her nickname, even after she got the title of Princess of Wales when she married Prince Charles.

She Was Homeschooled

Diana was homeschooled until she was nine and then attended a boarding school for the rest of her education. She failed her O-Level exams twice and dropped out of school when she was 16. She attended school in Switzerland for only one semester before she met Prince Charles.

She Worked as a Nanny and a Teacher

Before she met Charles, she held jobs as a nanny and a teacher, and her love for children ran deep. She was paid only $5 an hour to play with children, do laundry, and clean. She also worked part-time caregiver jobs in London's Pimlico area.

The First Royal Bride to Have a Paying Job

When she married Prince Charles in 1981, Diana became the first royal bride ever to have a paying job until becoming engaged to an heir. The Duchess of Cambridge was the first royal bride to have a university degree, which is where she met Prince William. 

Prince Charles Dated Her Older Sister

Diana met her future husband through her older sister, Sarah. Prince Charles and Sarah had a fling in the late '70s, which is how Diana first met the prince. "I introduced them. I'm Cupid," Sarah said.

Charles and Diana Were Related

Diana and Charles were actually distantly related. They were 16th cousins once removed, both descendants of Tudor King Henry VII. Prince William is also related to his wife Kate Middleton. They are 12th cousins once removed, related through Sir Thomas Leighton. Leighton is Prince William's 12th generation great-grandfather, and Kate's 11th.

Charles and Diana Had Only Met 12 Times

At the time, Diana was just 19, and Charles was 32. "They had only been together 12 times and at one point Prince Phillip pressured his son and said, 'You have to do the right thing.'" said Susan Zirinsky, senior executive producer of Princess Diana: Her Life, Her Death, The Truth.

A Record-Breaking Wedding Dress

Diana's ivory taffeta wedding dress was made by the husband-and-wife design team David and Elizabeth Emanuel. It boasted over 10,000 pearls and a 25-foot-long train, one of the longest the world had ever seen.

Her Favorite Designer Was Catherine Walker

Diana's private couturier Catherine Walker had a "quasi-sisterly bond" with the princess. Walker designed many of Diana's most iconic looks and is given credit for her signature style. On wearing a white halter dress designed by Walker in 1996, Diana wrote to the designer, "I was so proud and felt very confident to stride out there and deliver my first speech since the divorce. The compliments about your design and expertise would have made your ears burn."

She Always Wrote Thank You Cards

Diana was famous for writing thank you cards to anyone that gave her a gift. She reportedly wrote thank you notes to the thousands of people who brought gifts to Prince William after he was born. Today, some of her handwritten letters have been auctioned off for anywhere from $2,000 to $20,000, depending on the content and uniqueness of the note.

She Was Involved In HIV Awareness

Diana made history in April 1987 when she was photographed shaking an HIV patient's hand without wearing gloves. The photo helped spread the message of HIV awareness and educate the public's perception of the illness. That day, the Princess opened the UK's first HIV/Aids unit at London Middlesex Hospital that specifically treated patients infected with the virus.

She Had Famous Friends

Diana had many A-list friends, including Elton John, George Michael, Tilda Swinton, and Liza Minelli. Diana was also friends with Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn and stayed at their ranch in Colorado with William and Harry for ten days to escape the paparazzi.

She Loved ABBA

Diana was known to be a huge fan of Swedish pop group ABBA. The Duchess of Cambridge and Prince William honored Diana in a subtle way by playing some of ABBA's music at their wedding party in 2011.

She Coined the "Cleavage Purse"

With cameras following her everywhere, Diana had to be careful of what was photographed. She used her small clutch bags as a guard for her cleavage, to make sure cameras didn't catch a glimpse down her top. Most photos of Diana getting out of a car to enter an event show her using her clutch as a shield. Designer Anya Hindmarch, who worked with Diana often, said, "We used to laugh when we designed what she called her 'cleavage bags,' little satin clutches which she would cover her cleavage with when she stepped out of cars."

She Recorded Her Thoughts

After Diana's messy public divorce caused a tabloid craze, she decided to record her thoughts in order to tell her side of the story. She started documenting them in May 1991 and had a friend deliver them to British journalist Andrew Morton, who had been reporting on the royal family for years.

She Had an Affair

Barry Mannakee was with the police in the Royal Protection Squad before becoming Diana's bodyguard in 1985. After a year on her service, Mannakee was transferred off of royal duties because of an "unusually close relationship between the pair."

Her Dresses Are Worth Millions

Just a few months before her death, Diana held a Christie's auction of 79 of her most iconic outfits to raise money for AIDS and cancer charities. One of the most well-known pieces, fondly called "The Travolta Dress," sold at the highest price. The velvet blue gown that she wore at a gala at the White House where she danced with John Travolta is one of her most iconic looks.

Her Grandma Was A Lady-In-Waiting For Charles' Grandmother

Diana’s maternal grandmother, Ruth Roche, known as Lady Fermoy, was a close friend and confidant to the Queen Mother, Elizabeth I, throughout her reign. Several rumors claimed the pair had orchestrated Diana and Charles’ marriage, but on the contrary, her grandmother actually advised her against it.

Her Title Was Revoked

After divorcing Prince Charles in 1996, Diana's title of "her royal highness" was removed from her name. But Queen Elizabeth II was not the one insisting—Charles was. According to the terms of their divorce, "she is to give up her right to be Queen of England and to be called 'Her Royal Highness.'"

She Gave William an Adorable Nickname

Diana called her eldest son William "wombat" starting from the time he was just two years old. After a trip to Australia where they saw the cute native creature, Diana began lovingly referring to the young prince as "wombat."

She Invited Cindy Crawford to Kensington

Diana invited supermodel Cindy Crawford over for tea, mostly to please Prince Harry and Prince William who were teenage boys at the time. Crawford shared a throwback photo on Instagram on the anniversary of Diana's death in 2017. "She asked if the next time I was in London I would come by for tea—I think Prince William was just starting to notice models and she thought it would be a cute surprise for him and Prince Harry," Crawford wrote.

She Is Buried On Her Family's Island

After her tragic death in 1997, Diana was buried in Althorp Estate in Northampton. The estate has belonged to the Spencer family for over 500 years. A small island has been dedicated to her memory, with a temple on Oval Lake, where well-wishers can pay their respects.

Her Sons Celebrate Her Every Day

William and Harry find ways to pay tribute to their mother even today. Both had subtle references to her at their weddings, and they continue to serve the charities that she was so passionate about. William says he talks about her to his children frequently so they know that she lived, and that she was special, and that she would have loved them.

She Loved "Rocky Horror Picture Show"

Tim Curry once said in an interview that when he met her she thanked him for making the movie, telling him that it "quite completed" her education. The classic film has held up for decades, and the theatrics behind it are an obvious appeal to Di's background in dance.

She Was a Popular Cover Model

While she was alive, she appeared on the cover of People Magazine 50 times, Times Magazine eight times, Newsweek seven times, and Vanity Fair five times. She still continues to make headlines today through the legacy of her sons and their marriages.

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Post originally appeared on Upbeat News.