This comedian was enjoying what he’d hoped would be some much-needed peace and quiet on the roof of his apartment building, but he quickly realized he wasn’t alone. He did what all funny guys do and decided to document the exchange he witnessed for the whole Internet to see...
Getting Some Fresh Air
Kyle, a comedian who was well-known around Twitter, was taking a break from a holiday party to get some air on the roof of his apartment. He was looking forward to some quiet because the noise of the party was starting to take it out of him...
Christmas In The City
The fresh air was rejuvenating, even though it was bitter cold. He leaned forward against the railing and looked out over the view. It was Christmas in the city, and everything felt still and quiet...
Not Alone
- Suddenly, Kyle looked to his left, down towards the other end of the roof. Several feet away, a couple was also standing up on the roof. They seemed lost in a conversation and hadn’t noticed his quiet entrance. He couldn’t help but listen...
What Did He Walk In To?
He quickly realized the nature of their conversation. The couple was breaking up right in front of him, and they had no idea...
A Golden Opportunity
Kyle, the funny guy that he is, decided to open Twitter and document the exchange for some laughs..
#RooftopBreakup
“A couple is breaking up on my roof right now. I was tryin’ to enjoy the view. Now I will live-tweet the breakup. #roofbreakup” he wrote. Keep in mind, it’s freezing up on the roof, but he decided he had no intention of abandoning this scene...
Whatever That Means
Kyle actually couldn't believe what he was hearing. “I’m not looking for marriage, just what is right below marriage.” the girl said. Kyle typed away, the couple still oblivious to his presence...
His Big Break?
Kyle had been hoping for something to set off his comedy career. Maybe this Twitter-novella he was drafting about this unsuspecting couple would be his claim to fame...
Getting To The Issues
“Your roommates are jerks,” the guy retorted. “So don’t let me live with them then,” the girl replied. The story was revealing itself piece by piece. The girl wanted to move in with the guy. But the guy kept ignoring the issue…
Anywhere But Here
“NOT ON THE ROOF,” he said. Kyle was loving this. He didn’t want to have this conversation outside, even if he did think they were alone. But the girl truly didn’t care, and pressed on. As soon as Kyle tweeted “Not on the roof! Please!” the likes started flooding in....
Comin' In Hot
“You never let me talk!” Both of them yelled at the same time. It was honestly getting funnier each time one of them opened their mouths. Kyle’s thumbs have never moved so fast in his life. He didn’t miss a beat, sending tweet after hilarious, tea-spilling tweet...
Incoherently Angry
“I can’t be with someone who is so UGH what ugh stop!” shouted Girl. His tweets were going viral. There were hundreds of likes, retweets, and comments. One of the Twitter user wrote, “Girl is actually all of us when we are angry. Sometimes no words and just angry noises are all we have.”
Live Replies
The replies were rolling in. "#RooftopBreakup here we go again. This guy’s making everything about him! I hope she doesn’t let him get away with that.” Kyle followed that up with a live reply: “He says everyone told him New York just wasn’t for him…#RooftopBreakup”...
Asking The Hard Questions
Things were about to get real, though. All of a sudden, the girl got really quiet, and Kyle looked up from his phone. She was staring at the guy, her defenses down. She looked sad. She asked, “Do you see yourself living with me within a year?”
Oh No He Didn't...
Kyle thought they were about to have a genuine, heartfelt moment and maybe resolve their fight. But no. The guy gets a text and checks his phone instead of answering her...
Likely Story
“Are you serious?” the girl asked. Kyle fired out another, perfectly-executed tweet: “IT’S A TEXT FROM MY COWORKER. A WORK TEXT. #RooftopBreakup” While that was definitely hilarious, he kept wondering where the argument was headed. Were they about to end it all?
Trust: Gone
The girl stepped back. She was heated again. “I shouldn’t trust you. A text is more important than this conversation?!” she yelled. Kyle started tweeting his own reactions now. “OH he’s really done it…#RooftopBreakup”
Tall Orders
“Look, I don’t want to get married or have a baby or anything yet. I just want to be able to trust you and not fight all the time. #RooftopBreakup” Things were really taking a turn...
Caught?!
"Can't you just answer me?" the girl asked. "No, there's a guy over there. Can't we just go inside?" The guy had finally noticed Kyle. He froze, but didn't look up. He just kept transcribing the conversation...
That Wasn't Good Enough For Her
"He's just on his phone anyway. He's not listening," the girl said. Kyle exhaled. That's what she thought...
The Zinger
The guy was getting frustrated with her and let out: “I’m not talking about love on a rooftop in Brooklyn.” Someone online replied, “Please tell me some hipster band saw this tweet and is writing a song about it.” Another person wrote, “I designed a tee-shirt in honor of this.” Kyle was KILLING it...
Some Downers In The Crowd
Though a lot of the content was funny, some users weren't on board with Kyle broadcasting such a personal conversation. Someone wrote, “it was sort of insensitive to live tweet something like this. i know they did it knowing he was there but sometimes you can’t control when and where a conversation goes that way. they knew they needed to have the conversation right then and there.”
Another Text
The girl waits for his reply while resting her head in her hand. Suddenly, his phone buzzes once again. Back to Kyle: “Guy’s phone just blew up with texts. He immediately silenced it. Glares were exchanged. #RooftopBreakup"
She'd Had Enough
The girl finally said, “I can’t do this. You’re nothing but a big waste of my time.” Unfortunately, the girl was not aware of the support she was getting from the public for her decision. One person wrote, “Rachel, you can do better.”
How Can You Eat At a Time Like This?
...to which the guy said, “Are we getting pizza or what? I don’t mean to change the subject but are we?” What do you think of this comment? Kyle was absolutely giddy. This guy was putting his foot right in his mouth. She replied, “Why don’t you get pizza with ‘someone from work texts?’”
Rachel Is Walking Away!
The guy screamed, “Stop.” Rachel was not going to listen to him. She said, “Seriously this is just embarrassing, I’m done.” Kyle tweeted the scenario. He wrote, “RACHEL IS WALKING AWAY #RooftopBreakup.” The guy wasn’t finished yet.
He Panics
Guy asked, “So what does this mean?” The girl answered, “It means freaking, whatever ugh I’m tired.” The guy sighs and lights up again...
The Final Blow
Kyle felt a little guilty about this next tweet, but...fire away: “Great. I think we’re done here. *Guy exits. I’m still standing here. Do I swoop in?* #RooftopBreakup”
Silver Lining?
Even though the couple couldn’t fix their problems, Kyle’s Twitter clout skyrocketed. Maybe spying on someone’s conversation isn’t all bad? He at least changed their names!
A Trending Sensation
Kyle had been right - #RooftopBreakup had kickstarted his comedy career. Luckily, the couple has no idea.