Finding the perfect home is hard enough, but you don’t usually meet the neighbors until after everything is said and done. Sometimes, they can be a little…eccentric. Whether it’s the girl next door or couple down the hall, your house is surrounded. Read on to see some of the most hilarious and wild texts people got from their neighbors…
Hard Hitting Questions
Definitely two of the most unsettling questions to hear from your neighbor. Hopefully, this person lived to tell the tale!
*You’re
Besides not understanding the laws of physics, this guy doesn’t understand that it’s his problem!
Staring Star
She’s nothing if not a woman of the people. Best of luck to the old man, hope he gets the view he needs.
Introvert Intervention
Sometimes you don’t want to start a conversation, but this is a little harsh. Hopefully, Melissa is at least a good tenant!
Can Stop, Won’t Stop
This is why you stay on good terms with your neighbors! At any one moment they hold the power to flood your hallway with the sounds of Sweet Caroline on repeat for hours!
That’s Tow Bad
Trust no one, especially if you have a habit of stealing parking spots. Apparently, this guy had it coming though, he was warned!
Early Bird
The attempt to calm down their roommate is admirable but not worth it. This person should wait for sunrise to get their chores done. You know, normal vacuuming hours!
Words of Wisdom
This one is definitely nice but also just strange. A little Monday motivation never hurt anyone, but it’s certainly not expected from your next door neighbor!
No Pigs of Any Kind
Don’t dish out what you can’t take. This brutal reply from 2A Meghan did not come without some self-reflection, and hopefully, this person started bringing home some better choices!
No. Absolutely not.
Honestly, a fair response. You can’t borrow a kid, and you definitely can’t trick a woman into thinking you have a kid. Bad news all around.
Cookie Crook
The first rule of stealing food from packages…don’t get caught! Dave Next Door slipped up and now owes someone an apology and a batch of homemade cookies!
Law and Landlord SVU
Don’t ask, don’t tell is a two-part saying. Maybe just because they asked is a good enough reason not to tell. Some things are worth a white lie!
Lost and Found
A risky move that did not pay off. If you steal something from your neighbor, it’s going to be hard to hide it. After all, they live right next to you! Watch your back and your belongings!
Burrito Boyfriend
It can take some time to move on, but it takes less than $20 to get a burrito. Thankfully, Ryan can help you with one of these problems. He needs help with the other one though.
Buzz Blunder
Maybe the Stalin comparison is a little aggressive, but hey, maybe the pizza is really just that good.
Puke Problems
This isn’t very neighborly, but they have a point. Unless you can prove it’s theirs, your proof is null and void. You are…not the father!
Hail Mary
Are you even allowed to date Jesus? I don’t know, but this person is certainly going to try. It’s all about the effort!
A Simple Request
Well, what do you have against responsibility, Emily?!
Earned His Name
This is just rude to their neighbors and the community. If you want the responsibility of a dog, you have to clean up after it! Even Emily knew that!
Couple Comedy
Sometimes walls are too thin in apartments, and it leads to some wild stories. Some are a bit more risqué than this one, but it’s still funny!
Yard Dweller
Boys will be boys.
Weather Wondering
Just because you’re neighbors, doesn’t mean you’re friends! This guy learned that the hard way. Hope he stayed warm!
Router Ruiner
Mooching off of a neighbors WiFi is an old and delicate art. One surefire way to mess it up? Telling them about it.
Reason Identified
Ryan’s sympathy ran out after the third hour of sobbing., and honestly, I empathize. But maybe it’s time to get some earplugs, Ryan!
Checking In
I mean, they did give you only one rule. Seems like you don’t follow directions very well!
Party Time!
Worst couple on the planet is a pretty impressive title, and they lost it all.
Turkey Time
Cooking is hard, sure, but you still probably shouldn’t try to cook a turkey in a microwave. Would it even fit?
Finders Keepers
Apparently, no one is safe from thieves. They could be right outside your front door! Coffee lovers beware…
Stove Fiend
I admire the brazen disregard, but also don’t understand it. How are they so confident?
Missing Missy
I mean, pretty straight forward. Still upsetting for this mom, though. She just wanted Missy to get a chance too!
Pool Party
Nothing like a friendly neighborhood pool party, just make sure you bring the right friends!
Giving Back
I mean, they have a point. You should lock your doors or risk people sleeping in it!
Parking Not Permitted
She’s watching Ellen!
???????
????????????
Car vs. TV
A battle for the ages. Which is worse, the paint job or the TV show? Maybe both.
Sad Salad
It doesn’t hurt to ask! Well, it might hurt your feelings, but ask anyway!
Parking Wars
Yes! It does suck! I hope someone ended up happy from this exchange.
He Said, She Said
I said yikes!
Doggonit!
Get out of my house! My dog likes to be alone!
Bad Guy Brian
Just because he can doesn’t mean he will, Brian!
Hit and Run
This is an aggressive response to a small issue, but hey, maybe they really needed that vacuum!
Sasha Psycho
I guess she really earned that nickname…
No Offense
Uh, offense taken. And keep it down up there!
Hangover Cure
Not the eggs he had in mind, but I think he got what was coming to him!
Guantanamo Bay
A little harsh, and a little exaggerated, but probably not a good song.
Tree Murderer
The planet is dying, and you want to get rid of trees? Expensive and sad!
Breaking Up
Should have thought ahead on this one. It’s going to be difficult to explain this break up to the family!
Taking Requests
If they start watching all the Harry Potters, at least things will switch up every once in a while!
Something Borrowed
Some chicken? Maybe a red wine? A table? A chair? Things are tight right now.
Lisa!
Don’t come in between a man and his sandwich, Lisa.
Hugs and Kisses
Kind of a weird closer for a harsh text, but you do you, Helen.
Devil Woman
Clomping is kind of a funny word to put at the end of this aggressive message. I love it.
Cole, Please Stop
Cole’s not cuter than your bf. You should not leave him and let Cole love you. Cole’s not cuter than your bf. You should not leave him and let Cole love you. Cole’s not cuter than your bf. You should not leave him and let Cole love you.
Fire Album
To be fair, it’s definitely not one of her best works but still worth a listen.
“Not to be creepy”
Well, you were anyways! Don’t look in people’s windows! Selfies are a private practice.
Music Miss
If you want to blast music, get headphones! Don’t annoy your neighbors!
Spooky and Scary!
To her credit, that pumpkin definitely scarier now!
Delivery!
Who knew neighbors could be this terrible?!
Sick Days
I’m not sure who I side with both. Maybe neither?
Quality Cooking
No one wins in this story. Sorry to all involved!
Barking Laws
I’ll say it. I hate this neighbor too. Sorry, buddy.
3 Inches!
A low blow that Dan never expected.
Chop chop!
At least he’s eating his vegetables! Promoting good values for the sleeping daughter!
Never Have I Ever
I don’t think anyone won this game!
Hidden Treasure
In a way, it’s kind of a gift. This person just got given a scavenger hunt, best of luck on the search!
Shower Celeb
Shower time is personal time, and if you want to sing, you should! Just maybe get some voice lessons.
Remember This Day
This is definitely a triple A-plus story!
YEAH IT’S ROMANTIC
WHY ARE WE YELLING?
Roommates
Kind of hard to clean up the mess if there is no way I could clean it up?